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I have a problem with my girlfriend of one year. She feels more than I do in our relationship and thus has decided that she needs to break off our relationship. I feel very comfortable with the relationship but I understand that to be supportive I must do everything I can to make her happy. I know it's not my responsibility, but as her boyfriend I want her to be happy regardless. If she tells me to leave, I know I must, but what do I do about our relationship after that? How do I react to this situation?
Signed,
Concerned
Dear Concerned,
You seem to be a caring person. But, you can't control the feelings and reactions of another human being. It sounds like your girlfriend is afraid of becoming attached to you, without any inkling of a long-term commitment from you. You can reassure her that you love her, and that you will want to be with her or in her life. Leaving the door open allows for the possibility of being able to negotiate your relationship, rather than the black-and-white scenarios of being totally in love or breaking up. There are many shades of gray in between, and Alice encourages you both to try to find the one that fits your relationship at this time.
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